Yay! My new card reader came!

The computer I've been using doesn't have a memory card slot and the card reader I had couldn't manage my high capacity memory card.  Finally I have a new card reader so I can catch up what we've been doing.

Up first: We finally got a proper large tank for the hermit crabs.  We got it all arranged for them... and they looked lonely.  So we got two more.  Now we have Happy, Shelly, Lindana, and Spike.  These pictures are a bit funky cause they were all taken in very low light so as not to startle the aptly name shy creatures.  That's our kind of low-maintenance pet!

 Sabrina.  Oh, Sabrina.  She did look super cute this day, her outfit was quite adorable.  Then she ordered asked me to take pictures of her.  I actually took all these pictures through the front window while doing 5 other things.  She struck poses all over the front yard.

Kate's 3rd grade (with the 4th grade) Christmas program was last week.  It was a "Christmas Around the World" program.  Her class represented Mexico.  She got to pretend to hit a pinata during their song.  Alas, I didn't get it videoed cause I was having issues (mostly with Lizzie trying to run up front because she thought it was a real pinata and wanted the goodies).  Two of the girls' friends got to come with us.  We had 5 kids between 8 and 5 years old!  Fortunately they're all awesome kids and we had no problems at all.  We couldn't see Kate at all from our seats, though, so I had to sneak up to a closer door for a minute to get some closer pictures.

One day I looked out the front window and there was a cop car parked across the street turning away traffic.  After puzzling over it for some time I saw a few Questar Gas vehicles waved through the blockade.  Finally, to put my mind at ease, I called the police station to ask what was going on.  Turns out there was a gas leak in the area!  A couple of families in our ward were evacuated for several hours until it could be taken care of.  Thankfully everything ended in a wonderfully boring fashion.

 A week ago we went for Family Home Evening on Monday to the Spanish Fork "Festival of Lights".  It's a drive-through light show.  It was tons of fun!  Last year we went also, but I had a hiccup with my memory card and LOST all my pictures.  I have never lived down that shock.  So I took tons of pictures this time to make up for it, of course.  We listened to Christmas carols and watched all the amazing lights and moving figures.  We'll certainly go back before it closes, it was wonderful.

Here are some of my favorite pictures closer up:

A friend shared a link that was lots of fun for my girls.  Go to PortableNorthPole.tv and make a free personalized video for your own child.  This picture is of the girls watching Lizzie's video.  Santa says the kids names, opens a book which has pictures of them in it, talks about what they do during the day (You should have seen Kate's jaw drop when he mentioned her being in 3rd grade), etc.  Even through Kate and Lizzie both really know the "truth" about the game we call Santa, they like to continue playing along.  They loved these.

For some friends and neighbors (I know I am not going to hit everyone, and if we don't get you this year, that doesn't mean we don't love you!) I'm making simmering potpourri mixes.  It's a bag with cinnamon sticks, allspice berries, whole cloves, then I hung slices of fresh ginger root, oranges, and lemons.  They were so pretty in my front window.  Now that I have taken them down I really miss them!  The bags are all sitting filled and open by my chair right now, though, and it smells amazing.  Can't wait to simmer up our own pot of potpourri!

See this pretty panda bear ornament?  One of my brothers brought these back from China a year or so ago and it's really lovely.  Sabrina was looking at this ornament the other day and said "Mom, is this a Chinese polar bear?"  Why yes, I believe it is.  Pandas will forever be Chinese polar bears to me now :)

>>Big Sigh<<  So we're looking at houses.  We put in another offer.  Four words: short sale, long shot.  But we'd love to get this house.  It is gorgeous!  It's barely outside of Springville in Mapleton.  Like I said: long shot, but a girl can dream, right?  Oh, I'm dreaming big!

A word to the less than wise. Anyone wise wouldn't have these words to share.

I have discovered that the more upfront and honest I am about what's up in life, the easier it tends to be to deal with it.  I'm sorry if that means that there's a lot of junk I write about that you just really don't want to hear.  Feel free to skip reading it.  It just helps me work through it all.
Thanks to genetics, hormones, physical issues, etc, I am one of the more than 21 million Americans that deals with severe chemical depression and anxiety.  I have been medicated in some form since it because a serious issue about 6 years ago.  Currently I'm working with a doctor to try to improve my general health so over the next year or so I may be able to reduce my medications and handle things as much as possible in other ways.
Here's a little Depression 101:  Any surgical procedure of any sort (even as little as a knee scope) can set off a round of depression.  Chronic pain and/or illness can set off a round of depression.  High levels of stress (emotional, physical, financial...) can set off a round of depression.  Also an obvious key to keeping depression at bay: stay on all medications and only go off them gradually and under close supervision.
Now let's consider my last week... I had surgery which has resulted in severe pain for the last 10 days so far (okay, so technically that's more like a week and a half).  Stress and chronic illness are also hallmarks of life for me.  Oh, pain pills can add to depression also, and I discovered a time or two the absolute idiocy of trying to skip those early on.  Immediately after having the tonsillectomy I experienced severe throat pain (not really a surprise ;)).  Swallowing *anything* was severely painful.  I was diligent in drinking ice water.  It hurt to swallow but felt good going past.  I managed to take my pain pills because I knew that while they hurt like ^*&$# to get down they were key to living through the next 4 hours.  Swallowing an extra 4-8 pills per day, though.... 
Yes, I quit taking my pills.  I knew I wouldn't be alone during that time and I didn't have the energy to do anything naughty anyway, so I went ahead and didn't take them.  After about 4 days I started taking my reflux medication again because the pain in my stomach outweighed the pain of swallowing the pill.  And I still skipped the other 3 pills.  I promised myself that no matter what I would start taking them all again this last Friday -- 1 week after the surgery.  It seems like starting back on the meds after being off for a week was as bad as being off them was!  I was finally recovering a little energy and it all turned very grumpy.  Then the "nightmares" started.
Nightmare is the wrong word.  That insinuates that it happens while sleeping and that something actually *happens*.  This was creepier.  Saturday night I was lying in bed waiting for the pain pill to take the edge off enough that I could sleep.  >sidetrack<  Have you ever had that experience of seeing or feeling or hearing something that you're so sure is right there until you open you eyes and realize you must have been more asleep than you thought?  That's kind of what was happening.  I would shut my eyes and could see us both lying in bed and then things started to appear around us.  Bottles of pills, sharp knives, rope, plastic bags... things that in and of themselves could be quite innocuous, but considering everything they were downright frightening.  I pulled my eyes opened and could see that I was just in bed. Nothing weird.  But the second I shut them again it kept happening.  I didn't feel a great desire to *use* any of these things, but they were there.  It was nearly petrifying. 
I decided I needed to focus my mind on something positive, cause neutral territory was apparently no good.  I was drowsily thinking through various pictures of me with my husband and with out little family.  Beautiful, you'd think.  Except pretty soon that changed too.  I would "see" a picture, then a mask of gore would cover me in the image.  As I startled I'd "flip" to another picture and the same thing happened.  Seeing your own face covered in blood while smiling up from the midst of loved ones is quite uncomfortable. 
By this point it was exceedingly late (or early, depending on your perspective).  I woke Michael up and tried to tell him what happened, though it wasn't until the next morning I actually made sense.  After he tried comforting me I sat straight up at the end of the bed and refused to shut my eyes again. 
After giving me one of my anxiety pills (the kind I take rarely) Michael finally convinced me to get back in bed.  As usual, once the pill knocked me out I slept so soundly I didn't remember any dreams.  The next day I barely passed out of Michael's view.  Feeling that subconcious onslaught was so utterly overwhelming. If I had it all to do again (NOOOOOOOOOOOOOooo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!) I would open up my cymbalta capsules and sprinkle it in my pudding before I'd skip it entirely again.
So my words to the less-than-wise are these: First: don't skip the medication.  Second: if you have some compelling reason to skip it, keep company around.  Third: just because you're back on your meds doesn't mean you're out of the woods yet!  I had been back on for two days before this crazy muck happened.

I think I"m finally on the upswing of the recovery.  It is a very SLOW upswing, but things are improving.  I think at least most of the scabbing is gone now.  I feel less like I'm choking and my saliva isn't so gummy.  Gross I know, but it's all gross.  It is still very uncomfortable to do much talking.  Eating is still tricky and painful also.  I'm hoping as the swelling continues to go down that food will quit getting stuck in the surgical site too.  It would be so refreshingly unexpected to swallow and have food just go from mouth to esophagus without getting sidetracked! The referred ear pain is pretty well calmed down now too.  I think I was at an advantage versus the ear pain.  I've had so much severe ear pain and I knew it would come sooner or later, so it didn't catch me like some unexpected undertow.  I was better able to stand it because I know every bit of how it feels and how bad it can get.  It was bad enough, but not so bad as my infection in January.  I'm still absolutely wiped out, but I think I see a light at the end of the tunnel and I'm not walking on railroad tracks this time ;)

Chill, Dorothy, it was just a dream.

The Jarbh family was involved in a New Year's Celebration at BYU.  We were parading through and plaing music but were also honored guests.  We kept being introduced when we entered new rooms.  I was actually in charge of taking pictures (shocking, no?) but my camera was running out of batteries and film.  Film?!  Yup.  I had to flip the switch over to digital cause I ran out of film.  Carol was looking for more batteries for me.  BYU happened to be located in Arkansas, just down the road from where Kimball and Lorilee live.  And Peter had been hired to be in charge of heating in the HFAC where all the festivities would be held.  He was still with the rest of us, but he was responsible for everything else at the same time.  A number of the kids were playing with us but they were quite young.  Andrew, for example, was playing the trombone.  They were roughly the same size.  Grandpa Brunson and a number of Brunson relations were there as well.  As we entered the main gallery of the HFAC Uncle Gordon was the one introducing us.  Grandpa handed each family half a banana and Uncle Gordon gave each family a one dollar bill and said who was coming.  There were bananas alllll over the floor where people kept dropping them.  Uncle Gordon kept giving last names as "Brunson" instead of "Jensen" or otherwise.  When Michael and I came through he introduced us as "Brother Michael Brunson and Miss April Iphapes"

At that point I woke myself up by trying to yell "It's SOUTHERN!  And Janelle Southern!" and then being shocked that my Uncle (once you de-spoonerized the word) was calling me Ape-Hips!  Oh well, it was time to get up anyway.

This ^ is the approximate size of the Jarbh kids who were at the par-tay.